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Skaterman (not)
Skate Report - Wednesday, November 21. And then there were 7. Where the hell did the other 90 people go? After a week of basking in the glory of the biggest Sydney City Skate EVER, 90 people found an excuse to stay home. Next week I expect to receive a note form the mothers of all those who didn’t turn up last night. If no authentic notes are forthcoming, or if the excuse is feable ( e.g. “Skaterman is a mummy’s boy & I don’t like him being out after dark – signed Skaterman’s mum”) then you will be forced to skate within earshot of Johnny for 2 consecutive skates. Now that the disciplinary matters have been settled, I can get on with the business at hand.

4 days of storms, power outages, property damage, high winds & continuing rain combined to put doubt in the minds of many would be skaters. Only a handful of hearty souls were prepared to brave the elements, that thankfully cleared up & dried the pavements just before skate time. Those of us who turned up had a blast. “We few, we happy few, we band of brothers; For he to-day that sheds his blood with me Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile, This day shall gentle his condition: And gentlemen in England now a-bed Shall think themselves accursed they were not here, And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day.” – Henry V, ActIV, Scene iii.

Johnny led, followed by Graham, Helen, Florian, Bradley, Isabelle & myself.

Highlights: Graham’s fall at the start; my fall down some stairs (thank God for helmets!); Johnny’s jump off the shelter covering the George St escalator out of the Devonhire St tunnel; Johnny’s fall in Clarence St in front of moving traffic; Helen’s miscue of a speed bump at the Regent Hotel; Johnny backwards & Bradley forwards, riding the Opera House stairs; the foul-mouthed abuse from a security guard at the Opera House; Helen’s eloquent riposte of the security guard; & Johnny’s excitement in telling us how he had just had a chat with Keanu Reeves.

Tips for next week:
1. Florian, Isabelle, Bradley & Helen – learn to fall over;
2. The 90 people that were missing – turn up, or “That he which hath no stomach to this fight, Let him depart; his passport shall be made And crowns for convoy put into his purse: We would not die in that man's company That fears his fellowship to die with us.”

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