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Wednesday the 1st of March 2006, by JBGM
Well everyone took their time on arriving this night as the essence of rain in the air and those foreboding black clouds made everyone ask themselves twice if they were going to continue on this path into the city to hook up and form a living, moving and pulsating city anenomie on wheels!
Well everyone took their time on arriving this night as the essence of rain in the air and those foreboding black clouds made everyone ask themselves twice if they were going to continue on this path into the city to hook up and form a living, moving and pulsating city anenomie on wheels!

Everyone who was important was there and the ones who were not there were unimportant… at that moment in time… but otherwise are very important I am sure!!!

Rob the Small Wood, Tom the Ross Clift, a little ross around the edges but acceptable, Phil the eternal Greek Body God and the other Phil… I am still trying to place a finger on him…….Dow a Dee was here even in harsh circumstances as those bastards had ripped her and her friend off that very afternoon at the beach (I will comment no further) and she still had a smile on her face (suck that you bastards who ripped her off!!!!!!!!!!!!) The mountain-bike riding team was there including Ivan the madman mountain biker, and lots of pretty faces. Halle was actually quite pretty!!

Q'est ce que tu dit? “What did you say” in French is very relevant as tonight I had returned to Sydney from France JUST for the Sydney Bladers, City skate and I heard Sebastien talking behind my back, but not maliciously, to someone asking “ Where is that noisy bastard? In French that is Ou est les miserable???

I realised I had to shrink behind the veil of secrecy and pretend to be someone else. This Frenchman, SebastiEn, who spells his name with an e instead of an a, remembered over a year ago the noise that was associated with this Aussie who just happened to meet a beautiful French lass on this very Sydney Bladers City Skate like this beautiful night but 5 years previously, was a noise that would slowly and inevitably surface even under its very veil of secrecy!

Well I just had to ask “What did you say???” Then with absolute artistic movement I was able to continue on my rollerblades and keep going past him to start talking with Gillian Ting very casually on the steps. He looked left and right but did not see me. Unfortunately someone else did and I was unable to escape his penetrating look as I continued talking to Gillian.

Then as instantly as I began complaining to Gillian about losing my good FSK skates and having to use my old Salomon’s with terribly worn wheels, ROLLERBLADING.COM.AU appeared before my very eyes and I was blinded by the big writing on his helmet, oh and by the light! James had come to me like a night in shining armour, but in fact it was even better, it was a nice guy with a car full of skates. We quickly went back to his car, which was very messy by the way (and he even apologised for it!!) BUT was actually full of roller-blades and at that exact moment I had a deja vou. Only a few hours earlier a TV news announcement beamed into my head and the images read” Sports wharehouse broken into and 53,000,000 pounds Sterling in rollerblading gear had been stolen” I was shocked and at the same moment paralysed in my body, but floating in the air…incredible. Then I realised I was gliding on my rollerblades past James’ car and on up the road. I further realised that this was all too weird and I would never go kite surfing again all day with Robert Smallwood before the Sydney City skate and then down six light beers!!!!!!!! I think those light ones really do go straight to your head!

So on my about face I came back to the rear of James’ car and he allowed me to try on all the skates to find the best ones and I could use them this night! Now try and understand the mind of a sinner %$#@!…the mind of a skater I mean, and think about that never-ending dream of swimming in a pool of your favourite rollerblades. No, well me neither but think about being able to try every hot skate in the known universe until you found the perfect fit! Unbelievable eh? Well as it was he threw the first pair at me and they actually landed on my head!! BUT they fit well and the rest of the skate is history….but before I finish let me tell you about our leader for the night…..You thought I was just talking to Gillian Ting because she is drop dead gorgeous, well I was actually getting her to intercede on my behalf to her brother David the Miracle Ting (and that’s another story) to get him to lead us on one of his famous Sydney Bladers City Skate and that’s exactly what he did. But before we left he had to ask the BIG question….were their any Virgins here tonight? Consequently everyone here was well worn in and the skate commenced….after he talked for another 20 minutes about skating stuff……

We followed our leader, our champion, and crossed over into Hyde Park and meandered through in an incredibly zig zaggy way, until I realised we were just following the concrete path, but I had never noticed this before! We ended up at the beginning of the doors to the city at the edge of Hyde Park and the group as a whole flowed smoothly into the very core of the city! Little did I know but Sebastien had been inching his way closer and closer to me until I was beginning to get scared and thought about that moment when I left Paris and the riots started last November 6, 2005. Then when the music words of French flowed like warm fat out of the processing tubs in a butchers shop, I was overwhelmed with a sense of security and I unconsciously brought up the same regurgitation. YES YES YES was I becoming French. No No No I simply had brushed past some McDonalds thick shake that has been left on the side when I had jumped off the stairs and landed smoothly (I had thought) until I realised I must have landed on the McDonalds thick shake!!!!!!

After cleaning up my act I was able to communicate with this incredible French man whose name was Sebastien (But still spelt with an E!!!) We talked and skated through the city like two young people in a state of youth. This meant that we were still going to skate all night and then even after we skated a little more we would find a pub that was open and would serve us fucking beer~! WE talked about everything from Piss ins to Swimming pools. Est ce que tu ver venir avec moi a la piscine apre faire en roller???? “Hey do you piss in the pool at home???”
The "noise" began to slowly flow up through the mass of skaters until it became almost a song... almost as instantly as the songs slowly whelmed up Sebastien realised who I was and the game was up! From here on in the skate became very messy as we headed through Darling harbour and skaters started lolling behind here and there and going home early (PIKERS!) But its ok because as Sydney City Bladers we are definitely more friendly than those 30,000 French on the Paris City Skate and we let our friends pike when they have to>>..Um just jokes but seriously I would like to comment but the dammed Paris Massive city skate has always rested on an evening that I was there and the rain came down. Here comes the rain again falling, on my head like a tradgedy. Little did the Eurythmics know but they were right on the buzzer! I was in Paris four times and each time it rained, but no way on Bastille day, oh no the bloody sun came out at night when we were there!

SO after an interesting discussion about drinking beer with rollerblades on in a pub we really did have a wonderful night in perfect conditions with no riots and/or police either, yes it was dammed good! Rob the Small Wood , James the Cunning O’Connor and Sebastien the Great joined me for an ale down in Woolloomooloo where he continued to pull the bloody wool over my eyes…..When I opened them I realised that James had managed to bring one pretty face with us and it was not the end of the world...as we knew it!

 
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